ThE BloG wiTH No NaME

I would like to share with you, my friends and family, some segments of a recent personal study that relates to identity crisis. I'm sure when you hear those two words, you feel like you have an idea of what it means. Maybe what immediately springs to mind is a much older man with a shiny Red Lamborghini and a toupee. That's what television has taught us is someone that has an identity crisis. Victims of this malady look a lot more like us than what we previously thought.

So what is it exactly?

The Merriam Webster dictionary describes an identity crisis as: "a feeling of unhappiness and confusion caused by not being sure about what type of person you really are or what the true purpose of your life is; confusion about one's social role and often a sense of loss of continuity to one's personality."

So if we are to believe this definition to be accurate, how can a friend, family member, or associate, or worse, someone you don't even know validate your identity. How can "who you are" be so interwoven in "who they are"?

If we are accepting the above definition, that's impossible and unreasonable.

If you ascribe to the Bible as being truth, then Jeremiah 17:9 should be considered accurate and also further cement the point.

"The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?" (KJV)

Now what does the heart have to do with identity? Well, kinda everything! Who you are determines what you do. If you are inclined to follow Christ in all your ways and efforts, it flows out of you through praise, service, humility, and worship. If you desire the world's offerings and see that as who you are, then you reflect that in every aspect of your life. The news, what people think of you and how many friends you have equate to how your day will go and how much value you think you have.

What you felt in your "heart" was the reason you did most of the stuff you did in life. When you drifted towards drugs, it was in your heart. When you cursed God, it was in your heart. When you hated someone because of how they treated you, it was in your heart. When you decided to receive the Lord as Savior, it was in your heart. When you married who you married, it was in your heart. When you decided to have to set a goal in a certain field of study, it was in your heart. When you made a huge financial investment, it was in your heart. When you refused to forgive someone that hurt you, it was in your heart.

And still the Bible, which 2 Timothy 3:16 says is "profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be perfect, and thoroughly furnished unto all good works", says that the heart is more deceitful than anything else and incurable. Wow.

When Cain lifted up that rock over his brother Abel's head......When Moses, who although born Jewish but raised an Egyptian, had to stand up for a people he didn't know against a people he knew well.......When Esau traded his birthright to his brother for some soup......When Rachel gave her servant Bilhah to her husband, Jacob to lay with so she can get a leg up on her sister, Leah.....When that husband decides that since my wife is not responsive to me, I need to find someone who will be......When that wife says that since my husband won't give me what I want, I will not give him what he wants from me.........When that employee, who feels that the company doesn't look out for his best interests decides to take some supplies home as re-payment......

These are the afflictions of this heart. These are examples of a crisis of identity. 

Cain clearly didn't understand his worth and value.

Jacob and Esau made really bad compromises because what they wanted super-exceeded what was most valuable.

Rachel, in Genesis 30:8, felt that she was wrestling with her sister and won the battle and named her son as a symbol of that "victory". Was her purpose to be in a battle with her sister for their husband's affections or was that just a distraction from where her affections needed to be?

When you are challenged with understanding your identity, your focus is in the wrong place. And everything you attempt to build and accomplish will become of no value to you or anyone because it stems from an unhealthy, unfruitful place.

Besides being the wife of Jacob, the sister of Leah, and the daughter of Laban, who was Rachel? What was her purpose? Why was she graced with life and breath?

Have you ever looked at yourself in these terms? 

I am the parent of ...

I am the husband/wife of .....

I am the manager at ....

I am an associate at ....

I am the brother / sister of ...

I am the teacher at .....

It's clear that we can think relationally because those terms are how we see ourselves and what we think about when asked "who we are". We know our names, our addresses, and we know what kind of background we come from. We know all the hurts by name. We remember the pains like they happened yesterday. We wear the betrayals like a piece of jewelry. We know it all it seems. So why can't we engage relationally with the only One that can validate our identities? The only One that can effectively and accurately answer the question of "What type of person you really are" and "What the true purpose of your life is"? Wherever the Author is, every answer to who you are lies with Him. It would make sense that we cling to that valuable source of information but we don't. We instead try to find ourselves in the glimmering reflection of how we look in other peoples' eyes. Our friends. Our family members. Associates who seem to have it all together. Media and entertainment that says if you want to be happy and whole, eat this and wear this and talk like this and surround yourself with this.

People who don't have a firm grip on their identity make permanent decisions based on temporary situations. Like Rachel and Leah did in naming their children for example. Or how Cain responded to his jealousy with anger. Or how Esau willingly gave up the permanent for the temporary because his flesh was weak.

When we don't have a clear understanding of our identity, we don't tackle the issues in our generation and the next generation will be forced to deal with the full brunt of it. That alone should be enough encouragement to deal with our "stuff" straight away!

You can't truly love God and His people if you don't love yourself. And you can't love yourself the way you need to if you don't firmly understand your identity. It comes out into all of your relationships. You place impossible standards on your friendship. You harbor a poor self image. You carry guilt and shame. Your version of love looks more like manipulation. You create unfair expectations on yourself and expect others to live up to them too. It's unhealthy and it stems from our inability or unwillingness to fix our focus on the one who gives us our identity in the first place. We simply make a mess of our lives and that of those around us that we care about. We box with shadows and grasp at the wind. We lack stability and security, authenticity and peace. God loves us too much to leave us in a state like that. 

Colossians 3:1-4 says "If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth. For you died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is our life appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory."

There are plenty of keys to our identity in the Bible but this passage has a few.

1. "If then you were raised with Christ" asks if you were connected with Christ and that we walk in obedience to His word and after the pattern of His life on earth, where we look to a Kingdom to come but also have a sacrificial, unconditional love for His people. This asks us have we overcome the world like Christ has or does the world daily overcome us?

2. "Seek those things which are above" reminds us to think about the home without a number on the front steps or over the doorpost. Bear in mind that the place we are in is temporary and is not indicative of who we actually are. We should make heaven our aim because no matter how long we lived "down here", we are actually true residents of citizens of "up there". Now we have to live every day with that goal in mind which would be the stark opposite of everything we learned prior and every ideology and mindset that is around us.

3. "And your life is hidden with Christ in God" speaks to the new man that is forged in Christ Jesus when you receive Him as Lord. It is the core of our identity. It is more defining than your name in the marketplace and your clothes you wear or your status in the community. It is the only thing that doesn't fall away when all those other things do. It speaks to a security that we often still search for. Our lives are laid up safely in Him when we accept Him. Everything vital about who we are is locatable in Him. Every answer. Every wisdom. Every hope.

So the identity we are searching for is firmly wrapped up in Christ. We can't find it in our friends or family members who believe they have us figured out. We can't find it in associations and organizations that gladly use our talents and other abilities but cannot fill the voids within. We certainly can't find it in the world's model of how we should look, act, speak, think, or assess value to self. We will always come up empty when that's our motivation. 

Moses was smack in the middle of an identity crisis with his Jewish heritage and adopted Egyptian privilege but he came face to face with his identity when he came face to face with the Author of his identity. That's when he truly found out who he was beyond family affiliation and cultural heritage. He discovered where he truly came from.

Imagine what this world would be like if everyone in this world had that opportunity. We don't have to imagine it because they do.